Sunday, August 31, 2008

A Mad Look at... Jerry Lewis


Click to enlarge.

Gary Lewis and the Playboys

Jerry Lewis' son Gary had a halfway decent career as a pop star in the sixties as front-man for Gary Lewis and the Playboys.

They had a few hits - "This Diamond Ring" probably being the biggest one.

Here, we see them ape The Beach Boys sound with "Little Miss Go-Go". Note that this video was obviously shot in two different sessions, since the "Playboys" change outfits, and the girls put on considerably more clothing mid-way through.

Jerry Lewis

It's that time of year again - yes, the Jerry Lewis Telethon will soon be returning to our screens. Stay up with Jerry and watch the stars come out. Big stars, too - like Norm Crosby, Jann Carl, and John Tesh.

This year, we have the added bonus of seeing Ed McMahon, broke, and with a broken neck - slump through 22 hours of announcements - should be fun.

Today's clip is absolutely priceless. Jerry invites a young fan onstage during a concert in Brooklyn (circle all the mistakes right there). Try to guess how many notes of "You'll Never Walk Alone" the kid gets out before Jer angrily pulls the plug.

Sarah Palin

Here's future President of the United States Sarah Palin - when she was just a sportscaster for what appears to be an Alaskan public access channel.

Friday, August 29, 2008

Scrabble

If you play Scrabble (or it's cheap knock-off Scrabulous), I can't imagine a more important list than this one.

They left out my all-time favorite ("XI") - but I suppose they had to limit it to ten, and they already had "XU".

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Duchovny

He's a sex addict.

"I ask for respect and privacy for my wife and children as we deal with this situation as a family." Well, good luck with that.

Hillary Pointing

This is all B.S., right? She's not pointing at anyone or anything of significance.

The next time I do a presentation, I am so adopting this technique.

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Soda vs. Pop

I used to work with a guy from Minnesota who called Coca-Cola "pop".

I naturally assumed he was just being a folksy idiot, then one day I stumbled upon this chart, and realized that people all across the country have their own wacky euphemisms for "soda".

And as a bonus - here's a picture of the above robot walking the streets of Japan.

Photos That Changed The World

Here's a site containing a collection of unforgettable photos that literally "changed the world".

These days, most sites feel the need to let anyone and everyone "comment" on their contents. This often invites "trolls" and other anonymous troublemakers to write sarcastic remarks that sometimes deviate from the intended dignity of an otherwise serious effort. Sadly, this site (the photo site) is no exception.

So whatever you do, do not read the first two comments about the "5 year old Mother", the "Anne Frank" knock-knock joke, "Child Draws Home", and just about every other comment on the site.

Bill Clinton's Nose

If you watched the Democratic National Convention at all this week, you may have been wondering what's wrong with Bill Clinton's nose.

Wonder no more.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Blogged

A site called Blogged has reviewed this site, and given it a 7.6.

They claim this is "very good", but 76 out of 100 seems kind of piss-poor to me, no? I greatly prefer the user-review that gives me a 10. Hmmm - that writing style seems familiar somehow...

David Bowie

Here's David Bowie and Mick Ronson performing "Queen Bitch" on The Old Grey Whistle Test.

I've always been in awe of the guitar work and overall tightness of this particular performance.

Monday, August 25, 2008

What If...?

What if the four-eared cat also had three eyes?

Tom Smothers

Here's a great interview with Tom Smothers about the upcoming release of the Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour on DVD.

The interviewer asks all the interesting questions, like the time the Brothers played the Troubador, and John Lennon and Harry Nilsson showed up....

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Do Not Adjust Your Set

Do Not Adjust Your Set was a children's comedy airing in the U.K. from 1967-69. Most notably, it was the show that first assembled most (4/6) of the Monty Python team.

Here's my favorite clip from the show - Eric Idle singing Captain Fantastic, with all of the regulars (including Terry Jones, Michael Palin, David Jason, Neil Innes, and Denise Coffey) clowning around in the background. ("Captain Fantastic" was the name of the most popular recurring sketch on the show.)

It's a very catchy song - much in the style of pop music at the time. And yes, that's the Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band backing up Idle.

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Olympic Taekwando Ref-Kicking

Cuban taekwando competitor Angel Matos takes umbrage with Chinese referee - and rebuts with a few swift kicks to the cabeza.

A lifetime ban ensues.

Personally, I think Matos deserves the gold medal for providing much-needed blog fodder - this picture is freakin' hilarious.

The video is currently here, but those nasty copyright-enforcing goons at YouTube keep removing it. Note how the French announcer no-sells the excitement like it's just another Jean Reno movie.

Odessey and Oracle

Odessey and Oracle was a psychedelic album from The Zombies; recorded in 1967, it wasn't released in the U.S. until 1969 - after the band had already decided to call it quits.

Often overlooked, it deserves to be considered with other classic albums of the era. It's most memorable track - Time of the Season was a deserved hit, but the entire record is similarly remarkable and haunting.

I only recently discovered the band has released a fortieth anniversary live recording of the album, and is currently touring the U.S. with a show consisting mainly of songs from it.

This video is from a California show - and contains the first two songs from Odessey and Oracle. (Two good ones - Care of Cell 44, and A Rose For Emily).

Seinfeld/Microsoft

Hey - what's the deal with comedians who will do anything for a buck?

First, he's running around in a bee costume, now this.

Friday, August 22, 2008

The Lottery

A couple from Madison, WI have a formula for picking winning lottery tickets, and $1.4 million in recent winnings to prove it.

If only we can get our hands on that formula, we'll all be zillionaires.

The Fall of Mendte

It's in God's hands now.

Star-Studded Sketch

Here's an unfunny sketch from The Dean Martin Show - which appears to be little more than an excuse to shove as many celebrities as possible into a five-minute segment.

But what celebrities! Just about every big name from TV comedy, talk, and variety series of the time (1970) - appear. Even Lucy, Carol Burnett, and The Smothers Brothers - from rival CBS (Dean was on NBC) show up.

That's Petula Clark singing; she was a part of the British Invasion with her big hit "Downtown", and was a regular on Dean's variety show at the time.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

A Very Hitler WTF

I don't know where this is from, but it appears to be a guy imitating Hitler in Norway or some such place.

Just how he orders his "sachertorte" is worth the price of admission.

The Seekers

The Seekers were an Australian folk group that found great success during the British Invasion as a pop group. The primary reason? - lead singer Judith Durham had one of the strongest female voices of her generation.

Here, the band performs their biggest hit - Georgy Girl - live, with a backing string section. The performance is remarkably tight for a band with an upright bass. (Even the audience - especially the guy with binoculars - is a class act.) Enjoy!

Tree-Climbing Goats from Morocco

Not a Photoshop!

Not an Imaginary Story!

You simply will not believe your eyes when you see The Incredible Tree-Climbing Goats from Morocco!

Now with video!

Tired of MySpace?

Why not try Hoffspace? - the David Hasselhoff Social Network (officially endorsed by the man himself.)

I understand it's big in Germany.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Everyday Yiddish

Here are some Yiddish words that are commonly used in American English.

There's nothing funnier than peppering your speech with a few choice Yiddish words like "schtick" and "ganef", and although I'm not pleased with their definition of "golem" - it appears to be accurate.

Pastamania

In 1995, Hulk Hogan turned down the product that would later be known as The George Foreman Grill (allegedly, according to him) in order to throw his considerable clout behind a "mall" pasta chain called Hulk Hogan's Pastamania.

Of course, the fast-food spaghetti concept sucked balls, and Pastamania was down for the three count within a year.

This, despite Hulk working heavy-handed plugs into his wrasslin' interviews throughout that year.

Handball

This weekend, while watching the opening day matches of the Premier (soccer) League from England, I remarked to my wife - sarcastically - that the sport might be more interesting if the players used their hands instead of their feet - and were allowed to throw the ball into the goal.

So this morning I turn on the Olympics - and discover that my proposed sport exists already - and it's called Handball. It actually looks like a cross between Basketball and Soccer. (At first, I thought I was watching a basketball game with a really small ball, and a relaxed attitude towards "traveling".)

Judging from the Ali-G inspired names of its players, it's big in the Eastern Bloc. And according to Wikipedia, it's been around since the 1920's. (Who knew?)

This is the only Handball clip I found on YouTube that I didn't annoy me. It's boring - but you'll get the idea.

Monday, August 18, 2008

Left vs. Right

Left vs. Right is Microsoft's new comical search engine using the same surreal streaming-video technology as last year's Ms. Dewey.

Like Dewey, it's a completely useless search engine, but it's worth checking out for the seemingly random "funny" responses to your queries. Unlike Dewey, this one has some kind of political theme, and MSNBC as a sponsor.

Yearbook Yourself

Here's a site where you can take your face - and place it unconvincingly against various public domain yearbook photos through the years.

There are enough afros and fat guys in there to make it worth a chuckle.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

San Diego Padres

I'll admit I haven't paid any attention to the Padres since about '84 or so ... but I just caught a few minutes of their latest on ESPN and - regarding the uniforms... damn. Just damn.

The Padres were already contenders in the worst uniform of all-time category with their 70's "brown and yellow" monstrosity, but this camouflage-ish thing takes the bloody cake.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Adjusted For Inflation

I'm slightly bugged by the news that after just a few weeks - The Dark Knight is being called the second highest-grossing film of all-time.

I guess it's too tricky to accurately adjust these things for inflation, but according to most such attempts, Gone With The Wind (above) is #1, and Star Wars is #2. In fact, Dark Knight isn't even in the Top 40 (yet).

When I was a kid, blockbusters like Star Wars, E.T., and Jaws played in first-run theaters for over a year, and people went back to see them again and again. These days, a year is enough time for a movie to hit DVD, HBO, and be long forgotten. (Dark Knight will probably be on DVD within six months.)

They just don't make "highest grossing films" like they used to.

Friday, August 15, 2008

Ernest Borgnine

"Tinseltown Treasure" Ernest Borgnine shares his secret for longevity with Fox & Friends.

Hot Chicks with Douchebags

Some sites just describe themselves perfectly.

Solo Cups (Red ones)

This post started to be about Dora Hall, and how her husband (the CEO of the Solo Cup company,) bought her a $400,000 TV special in the late sixties, and put her face on the back of the cup boxes for a bewildered public to ponder throughout the next decade.

It was going to be about all that, but then it started to resemble War and Peace, and quickly wandered into Who Gives a Shit territory. And the payoff, a video clip from one of her specials - looks like a cross between Barney the Dinosaur and Lawrence Welk.

I'd like to salvage all the painstaking research that went into this aborted post by sharing the most interesting fact I discovered from the Wikipedia article on Solo cups:
Red Solo plastic cups have become synonymous with underage drinking and binge drinking in the United States. Although ostensibly first used as a more discreet alternative to simply drinking beer straight from the can or bottle or in a transparent cup, today a red Solo cup, especially in a collegiate setting, is considered more likely to contain an alcoholic beverage than not. Solo cups have become the cup of choice for Beer Pong and Flip Cup on college campuses.

Who knew?

Thursday, August 14, 2008

On This Date...

Here's a site that tells you what song was #1 on the U.S. charts on the day you were born. (It even links to the iTunes Music Store, so you can listen to a 30-second sample.)

Nothing quite underscores how very old you are than to look back at what was popular when you were born: check out what was #1 when The Golem was born!

Mortgage

Are you currently experiencing the indignity of a foreclosure? Well, maybe it's because you got your mortgage through one of these obnoxious "dancing girl" internet ads?

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Sandy Allen

One of my few regrets in life was once paying to see an obviously miserable Sandy Allen inside a half-assed Guiness Book of Records museum on the boardwalk in Wildwood, NJ.

The "World's Tallest Woman" (7'7 1/4") died this week at 53. That's actually a pretty good run for someone who probably suffered from acromegaly.

Dateline

Here's a very funny clip of an extreme reaction from one of those Dateline sex predators.

If you liked that (and who wouldn't?) - here's the Ten Best 'To Catch a Sex Predator' moments as compiled by Best Week Ever.

Olympics

The Spanish Men's Olympic Basketball team placate themselves with not being a serious medal contender by making "Chinese Eyes" for local courier ad. It hits the Internet and international hilarity does not ensue.

Apparently, not everyone in China is denied web access by the government, cause there's a shit-storm of controversy over this.

Here's a hilariously bad translation of an article debating the issue in a Spanish newspaper.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

David Letterman

Here's part one of an entire episode of David Letterman's original NBC talk show. Not "Late Night" - this is the show that aired in the morning.

That's right - NBC thought Letterman's schtick was perfect for the game show and soap opera crowd, and cleared 90 minutes from it's schedule (including the long-running Hollywood Squares) to prove it.

The show was a flop. Within weeks, NBC shortened it to an hour, and after four months - it was canceled.

I only ever remember seeing the 90 minute versions when they first aired, and although there were a few memorable moments - I recall the show as being mostly boring. From what I also can remember, critics mostly praised the later episodes, and the show went on to win a Daytime Emmy.

Monday, August 11, 2008

Madden 2009

In honor of Madden 2009 (it's in stores tomorrow), here's Frank Caliendo doing his one good impression.

I once heard this guy on Opie and Anthony; he was doing the Madden voice, but with absolutely no pre-written material. He's a shitty ad-libber. God, it was awful.

Enjoy!

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Wrestling Gone Wrong

Whenever I need a little pick-me-up, I head over to Wrestling Gone Wrong and check out the latest videos of botched piledrivers, powerslams and such from the world of Pro Wrestling.

They rotate their videos, but you can currently catch the time a fan hit Shane Douglas over the head with a real chair - and many other of your other favorite "wrasslin" bloopers.

Note: Not necessarily for the squeamish!

Saturday, August 9, 2008

Bernie Mac

Bernie Mac is dead at age 50.

I think this clip is a fitting tribute.

Billy West

Billy West is a successful voice artist, and one of the best things that ever happened to The Howard Stern Show during his tenure there in the 90's. Surely you would recognize his voice from Futurama, Ren & Stimpy, Doug, or any number of the cartoons and commercials he's done over the years.

He's also a very funny guy. Today, we have a recording he did for an offbeat Christmas record, where he imitates The Three Stooges (the "Curly Joe" lineup) - all three of them - recording "The Twelve Days of Christmas".

What's remarkable here is not how great his Larry Fine is - we knew that already - but how well he nails Curly Joe DeRita; easily one of the most obscure voices imaginable. The dialogue is priceless.

(Courtesy Billy West and Quick Stop Entertainment)

Friday, August 8, 2008

Hole in the Wall

Having apparently run out of lame British game shows to import, American networks are now setting their sights on Japan for insulting new series concepts.

FOX is so excited about Hole in the Wall - their version of a popular Japanese game show described as "Human Tetris" - that they've bumped the equally odious Moment of Truth until January to debut it.

As you can see from this clip, it has little to do with Tetris - a classic video game requiring skill - and more to do with trying to squeeze your ass through a cutout before getting knocked into a pool of water.

The show has spawned multiple international variations - including an Italian version that uses bikini babes as contestants.

So get ready - this will be everybody's favorite show within a few months.

Artie Lange - Rehab

Well, the inevitable has finally happened - Stern sidekick Artie Lange checked himself into rehab this week.

In honor of the big guy cleaning up his act, here is the famous scene from Dirty Work where legendary insult comic Don Rickles - referred to Lange as a "Baby Gorilla".

Lookalikes

Lookalikes are always good for a laugh - especially when they don't quite look like who they're supposed to look like.

This site - from the UK - has some good ones.

The picture above shows very convincing Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr lookalikes (or is that the real Ringo?) with - hmmm... looks like John Belushi on the right, and who's that supposed to be on the left - Richard Branson?

Thursday, August 7, 2008

What If...?

We haven't done a "What If" lately so -- let's all close our eyes and imagine what it would have been like if Sammy Davis, Jr. had sung the theme song to Hawaii Five-0.

I think we can all agree it would have gone something like this.

(Courtesy of AprilWinchell.com)

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

The Hollies

Here's one of my favorite videos and one of my favorite pop songs. It's "Carrie-Anne" performed by The Hollies on the Smothers Brothers show in 1968.

Graham Nash (above) reportedly wrote the song with Marianne Faithfull in mind (Hey, Marianne?) - but was too shy to use her name in the finished version; hence the change.

The steel drum solo was revolutionary at the time.

Enjoy!